Believe it or not, it took me a month to visit all the historic stuff in Philadelphia.



Old City is definitely aimed at tourists. Being such, you have to pay to visit most things. They have a National Constitution Center that’s $12 to get into. Independence Hall costs some amount for a tour. But my friends and I are cheap so we stuck to the free stuff.

The highlight was the Liberty Bell — a symbol of equality and freedom in our country. It was used as a symbol for abolition and later for women’s suffrage. It’s now better known as the logo for the Philadelphia Phillies baseball team and every third restaurant in the city.

After checking out the little info boards about the bell’s history, we finally joined the congested crowd in front of famed bell. It took quite a while to even be able to see the bell, but soon enough we were about eight feet from it.

I busted out my camera to get a picture of the glorified symbol of America. Simple enough, right? NO! Every single group of people had someone take their picture as they stood in front of the damn bell. I forgot that Americans tend to be self-important ass clowns who think their agenda trumps all — it was like everyone in Johnson County condensed into one building. But unlike Johnson County it was a melting pot. Black, white, Hispanic, Asian and immigrants all took their turns blocking my picture.

It took about 10 minutes before I finally got a shot in. I took the opportunity to heckle a few groups for their selfishness. They deserved it — crowding my personal space bubble, cutting, unnecessarily posing for long periods of time, making technologically disabled grandma take the picture with a digital camera. Finally I was able to get a few snaps of the cracked bell before moving on with my friends.

But the Liberty Bell reminded me of my look at Americans. Most are selfish asses who stand in my way. They block my way to photo ops, rights and great opportunities with a cutthroat “me-first” mentality. It’s sad that you can’t even escape this thought at one of the landmarks of our country. Hope I don’t have to spend my life heckling jackasses to level the playing field.

God bless America.