My mom was bitter when her boyfriend left Nebraska in 1973 to study transcendental meditation in Switzerland. She was hip, but David had crossed the line. I picture mom’s former fling floating on a cloud over the Alps in half-lotus position, chanting like a monk while his fingers formed a circle on either knee. “Ohmmmmm,” he’d utter. That’s what I imagine.

Upon further research, I found that followers of transcendental meditation make innumerable promises about the technique. The list is long, but some of the coolest benefits include stress reduction, increased intelligence and creativity, decreased depression and anxiety, inner calm, happiness and more intimate relationships. Oh yeah, and world peace.

Perhaps David wasn’t smoking too much dope. Perhaps he was onto something. Today, almost six million people practice transcendental meditation, including about a million Americans.

Photo by Kit Leffler

Once upon a time

His Holiness, Maharishi Mahesh Yogi, arrived in California on a winter day in early 1959. With him, he brought a grand plan and, presumably, little luggage. Maharishi’s plan was to familiarize the world with transcendental meditation. His ultimate message? “Life is bliss. Man is born to enjoy. Within everyone is an unlimited reservoir of energy, intelligence, and happiness.”

Maharishi believed people could learn to live life this way through transcendental meditation. And some people did. Half a century later, millions have jumped on the bandwagon for some pretty substantial rewards. Maharishi’s world plan was to launch peace palaces, centers where people could learn the transcendental meditation technique, in 3,000 major cities of the world.

Proving it

More than 600 studies have uncovered the scientific truths of this meditation phenomenon. Between 1978 and 2000, the results of 47 studies confirmed a phenomenon that was later tagged the “Maharishi Effect”. They found that in societies with 1 percent of the population practicing transcendental meditation, there was a measurable downturn in crime and a positive change in community cohesion.

Transcendental meditation is one of the most studied human development programs in modern science, with more than 200 universities and research centers devoting countless hours unraveling the truth about transcendental meditation.

A National Institutes of Health study found that patients who “ohmmmed” cross-legged for one year lowered their blood pressure more than patients who skipped the lotus position and simply followed muscle relaxation techniques.

The Maharishi University of Management, founded by — you guessed it — His Holiness himself, cited an overall rise in IQ scores in students practicing transcendental meditation. The Journal of Social Behavior and Personality found that practicing transcendental meditation increased self-actualization three times more than other techniques. And a 1973 study at the University of Kansas found that inmates at Stillwater Prison who utilized the facility’s transcendental meditation program were more involved in prison activities and experienced reduced levels of anxiety. They also had fewer disciplinary rule infractions and parole violations.

Sounds so good I had to try it

The transcendental meditation program contains seven steps and takes a measly four to five days to learn. It sounded great until I checked out the price tag – a whopping $2,500. After a polite goodbye, I enlist the help of Rick Winfrey, a practicing Buddhist and Wichita senior in religious studies and enviromental engineering. Winfrey practices Shinay meditation. He says Shinay means “calm abiding” in Sanskrit. Winfrey explains his first meditating experience with the nostalgia of the recently de-flowered. During his first experience, he says he felt a strong feeling of recognition coupled with a pair of eyes that were continuously opening. Cool enough, I think. Let’s get started.

Naturally, I had asked Rick to meet me under a tree on campus. However, it’s important to minimize potential distractions, so we relocated to a concrete bench behind Wescoe. Rick is ultra-mellow, hospitable and eager to share his vast cosmic wisdom. Sitting “comfortably erect” with my hands on my knees, I avert my eyes downward 45 degrees and place my tongue behind my front teeth, as instructed. Winfrey and I practice sustaining attention on in-breaths and out-breaths. I sit with my feet planted on the grass, breathing slowly and feeling quite uncomfortably erect.

Truthfully, everything is a bit blurry and an 11:00 class seemes suddenly manageable. Many rookies mistake zoning out for successful meditation. Winfrey points out that meditation is not zoning out, nor is it relaxation. If you’re bored during meditation, you aren’t meditating. Oops. My tutor assures me that it takes practice.

Gotta try it?

Meditation is one of those things that shouldn’t be attempted without the supervision of a grownup. A qualified teacher is imperative for the safety of your sanity. The Transcendental Meditation Program holds lessons in Kansas City, Mo. Visit www.tm.org for the skinny. But, if you’re like me, and see $2,500 as a year’s rent, visit the Kansas Zen Center, 1423 New York St. Members of the center learn about Zen Buddhism and meditation through workshops and activities, including some that are free, held in this neck of the woods.