Friday, April 13, 2007
I told my dad to put more money in my account because I needed a book, but instead I bought sunglasses.
My girlfriend says the vibrating cock ring is the best invention since the cotton gin. What do you think?
To the man sitting outside The Crossing all by himself: You’re sad and pathetic. Make friends. And it’s also Wednesday. Stop drinking.
If you try to hand me a neon pamphlet, I will kill you.
Oh God, I’m a Free for All virgin. I don’t know what to say.
When they remodeled Hash, they gutted it from the inside out. When they rebuilt it, they forgot to put the heart back in. Hash is dead.
I know how they paid for the renovations of Hash. DSH sold its human decency.
I wish I had a shirt that said, “I already fucking voted.”
I told my dad to put more money in my account because I needed a book, but instead I bought sunglasses.
These shoes rule.
United Students is way hotter than Delta Force.
Free for All, have you voted yet?
Do not douche.
Dude, it’s like the clouds.
Guess what? I have herpes! Do you know who I am? One lucky lady will find out two to three weeks from now.
If Christina Aquilara shaved her head, they would call her “Christina Have-no-hair-a.” I’m going to keep calling this until you put this in the paper, by the way.
For the first time in my life, I really love Global Warming, just because I want to get rid of this cold weather in April.
(Female voice) I hate the Boy Scouts, they would never let me join.
Hey Delta Force, there’s free beer from the Hawk every Wednesday 7-10. Don’t try to take credit for it.
Why doesn’t the Kansan give me the news I need to know? What happened with Chris at Hash? Everyone is talking about it, and I don’t know.
Who’s Chris, what did he do to get fired, and why should I care?
A Chris Parade would be the most awesomest thing ever. Boobs and beer!
I sold my Lexus so I could sniff more cocaine.
Free for All, my girlfriend of twenty months just dumped me out of the blue. Do you know any sluts?
Will you please let the guys on campus know that while it is okay for them to wear pink polos, it is never okay for them to wear fuchsia hoodies?
Free for All, doesn’t the Lawrence Police Department have anything better to do than shoot poor, innocent dogs? I mean, they shot a poor, innocent dog. It’s all the people who don’t think pit bulls are good. One time, I got bit by a dachshund. I move that we destroy all dachshund, and don’t allow them to be bred anymore. They are much more annoying than pit bulls, and it bit me!
Is Delta Force just another name for Tri Delt, or what?
I’m going to use my ninja skills to get (disconnected).
Here, come have sex with my dog so I can tape it.
I ran the Wescoe Beach Gauntlet five times today, and was only accosted by people wanting my vote twice. I call that a win.
Hey Delta Force, if you keep sending my junk mail, you’re going to lose my vote for the next four years.
The sun came out, and it’s not even tomorrow! How cool is that? Spring is mating year.
Free for All: April 12, 2007
I’m just holding a phone up to my face and talking to ...
Free For All: April 11, 2007
I’ve decided to wear black for the rest of the week to ...
Free for All: August 16, 2007
The band doesn’t play “Thriller” this year. Well, the games just won’t ...
Free for All: March 15, 2007
Who put chopsticks into the holes on the intercom in Hash’s elevator? ...
Free for All: March 5, 2007
Spring has come again, which means the start of another baseball season, ...
Free For All: September 6, 2007
The comment before this one sucked.
Free for All: April 3, 2007
Dear Free for All, how do you cook panda meat? I just ...
Free For All: September 25, 2007
This is your voice. What do you think of it?
Free for All: March 1, 2007
I would like to know where these people were fixing potholes, because ...
Free For All: Sept. 17, 2007
I just saw van slam into a car, and it was awesome.
Free for All: May 8, 2007
My roommate just lost her shoe in the river on Tennessee.
Free for all: Oct. 17
Free For All: Sept. 10, 2007
Did anybody see the K-State video on YouTube? Don’t forget your power ...
My lil’ buddy
I promise he’s not an accessory. He’s my best small friend.
Free for All: September 11, 2007
You go to college because after waitressing for twenty years you’ll have ...
Free for All: September 5, 2007
So Free For All, my roommates and I don’t know how to ...
Free for All: April 30, 2007
My honors chem professor just made a pickle glow. Take that, regular ...
Free for All: May 7, 2007
I got on the bus seat, out of the rain, and it ...
Free for All: March 2, 2007
It's only been a week of Lent, and I've already messed up ...
Free For All: April 16, 2007
I called because I didn’t know what you sounded like, and frankly, ...
Free for All: April 2, 2007
Does Gumby’s deliver to Wichita?
Free for All: April 10, 2007
I just got done using a handicapped stall, and I was wondering ...
Free For All: February 23, 2007
I think I’m giving up homework for Lent.
Free For All: April 19, 2007
Why do people wear sunglasses on cloudy days?
Free for All: April 6, 2007
My female friend, who is straight, didn’t want to lose her virginity, ...
Free For All: August 27, 2007
To the cute girl in the red car who just let me ...
Free For All: April 18, 2007
Free for All is my new addiction.
Free for All: April 27, 2007
Can you tell me why I’ve been waiting in the rain for ...
Free For All: September 4, 2007
It’d be cool if cops drove minivans.
Free for All: April 9, 2007
Hey Royals fans, I can’t hear you now. Oops! Two and one, ...
Free For All: April 25, 2007
When is a door not a door? When it’s ajar!
Free For All: March 26, 2007
I passed Buffalo Wild Wings as KU lost the game. I’m pretty ...
Free For All: May 10, 2007
Stop. Hammertime.
Free For All: Sept. 18, 2007
Screw the K-State Power Towel. If you’re going to the KU, K-State ...
Free for All: May 4, 2007
I found a hat that says "Jawhawk." What does that mean?
Free For All: May 2, 2007
Thunderstorms are God’s way of giving hippies showers.
Free For All: August 30, 2007
To the person who made the comment about the drumline: No sir, ...
Free for All: April 24, 2007
It just wouldn’t be Wescoe beach without the crazy flier hander-outers and ...
Free For All: November 30, 2007
To the kid I copied off of: you are dead!
Free For All: April 5, 2007
Free for All, my boyfriend was kissing this girl on the poster. ...
From left: Kimberlee Hinkle, Libby Johnson and Hannah ...
1 comment
Kansas Jayhawk fans hold aloft a reproduction of ...
2 comments
Erin Saupe, a Ph.D. student from St. Cloud, ...
1 comment
0 comments
Armed robbers continue to threaten.
3 comments
Lecture from Greg Mortenson, co-author of New York ...
0 comments
Comments
Free for All: April 13, 2007
Why don't more people comment in the Free For All discussion section? It can be a consolation bracket, where you can type the things they didn't print because they weren't funny, or where people can answer questions posed in Free For All. Like what's the deal with Chris and Hash?
Sign in to comment
Or login with:
OpenID