It doesn’t matter how many years you have stayed a virgin. It doesn’t matter that you’ve been shown a million slides in high school of people with STDs causing their genitals to puff up like red cauliflower. Promises to your family, your friends and even to your God may not be enough. In college, the occasion or opportunity for sex is going to present itself if you are in any way a social person.

It seems as if our society, our friends, our significant others, the media, and our own bodies demand sex. Understanding these demands and influences is a complicated process. Although biologically we may encounter some of the same emotions, drives and desires pertaining to sex, we all come from different backgrounds. Everyone is influenced differently by society.

One aspect of our society that has the potential to greatly affect our sexual desires is the media. Advertisements are saturated with pretty faces or bodies.

Omri Gillath is an assistant professor of psychology who teaches classes about close relationships and sexuality at the University of Kansas. Gillath said that this sexual exposure was a product of natural human sexuality.

“Sex sells,” Gillath said. “Using the heavy traffic on pornography sites as evidence, people look for sex in order to explore or enjoy it. Evolutionary biology suggests that our curiosity stems from our reproduction motivation.”

But is it our biological drive that influences media producers and advertisers to put so much stock in sexual programs? Or is it the media that affects us? Gillath said it was both.

“We are motivated to succeed in the love game, and we’ll do whatever we can to win,” he said. “Gaining information from sexual programming is a good first step. Obviously when we’re surfing the Net we’re not thinking evolution or survival. But the fact that it’s implicit doesn’t mean it’s not there. Plus, there is nothing wrong with some virtual practice to improve the chance of success when encountering the real thing.”

Religion can also play a huge role in sexuality.

“If you have been raised thinking that sex is dirty or wrong, you might develop a negative scheme and try to avoid sex, although deep down you have the same drives and desires,” Gillath said.

Religion has also been known to influence some lawmakers in policy making decisions regarding sexuality.

“When people have very strong religious beliefs, they are often willing to pressure their representatives to pass laws based on those religious beliefs,” said Carolyn Johnson, an adjunct lecturer in constitutional law. “In general, people are allowed to have laws as long as there is a majority supporting them, even if the law has some moral or religious basis.”

Although it may be easy for some to protest governmental and religious regulation in the bedroom, there are situations when religious morality can outweigh personal sexual preferences.

“There are definitely some people who feel that sexuality is not an appropriate topic for governmental regulation, at least between two consenting adults in their own home,” Johnson said. “Beyond that, however, there is broad agreement that regulation is appropriate. For example if someone likes to have sex with children, I think a lot of people would agree that government should be in the business of regulating that.”

The Bible also plays a part in sexual prudence.

“It’s a fact that religion is still very influential,” said Timothy Miller, who teaches “Religion in American Society” at the University. “Many people think that the Bible is the key source of knowledge of information and moral guidance in the world.”

Miller said that some of the Bible’s views of sexuality stemmed from the cultural norm of the time period in which it was written. A few of these views stressed that sex preferably took place in heterosexual marriages.

The college life can put additional stress and pressure on our sexuality. If you think you are alone in worrying about finding a partner, you are mistaken.

“We all want to find a partner. We want to be a part of this ‘mating game,’ ” Gillath said. “The reason why close relationships in general and sexuality specifically can be so stressful is because there is a lot at stake. College provides the opportunity to find our other half, and it is highly stressful to think that we might miss the opportunity and end up alone, as many people do these days. In 2006, married people were the minority in the U.S. for the first time.”

Gillath explained that the levels and types of stress differ from male to female. Women might show a more negative attitude toward sex than men because there is more to risk. Rape and abuse are more serious concerns for women, and pregnancy is a serious situation that women must deal with.

“They are the ones who will have to invest nine months in pregnancy and even more time in child care, whereas men can theoretically spend 10 minutes and walk away. With a different set of concerns, their behavior is very different.”

Given this knowledge, Gillath said, it was no wonder that women generally felt more pressure to find the right partner and therefore are more cautious in choosing.

These are but a few of the societal aspects that make human sexuality such a complicated topic. One’s sexual preferences can be altered by a religious background, the choices of his or her friends, or the current laws of the land. Some might also be acting strictly on what their biology and psychology demands of them. What is accepted in our society differs greatly from others. What we know is that we are a product of our surroundings, and we are destined to conform in accordance to our influences.

— Edited by Jeff Briscoe