Wescoe Wit

By Ashley Thompson

Thursday, September 27, 2007

(Cell phone rings in large Budig class)

Professor: Do you want to put that on vibrate? It feels better.

---

Guy: I wonder if the ovary has an epic duel with all the sperm. Like in 300.

---

Guy1: What are you doing with those pink panties?

Guy2: You want them?

Guy1: No. Thanks. I’ve got my own.

---

Girl: R-e-a-d-a-b-o-OK!

---

Guy: The bathroom smells horrible! It’s a weapon of ass destruction!

---

Guy: If I don’t keep my adrenaline up, running around killing people and snorting cocaine, I will die.

---

Guy: I want to say this in the least creepy way possible.

Girl: What?

Guy: You make our room smell good.

---

Old man: Have a great day!

Bus driver: Thanks, you too.

Old man: I might ride you later.

Bus driver: See you then.

Old man: Bye sweetie.

---

Professor: Your expressions aren’t encouraging. None of you seem like you want to be here. Are you guys all drunk or something? Or is it that painful to sit through this class on a Friday?

---

Guy 1: Have you heard of that new video game that can read brain waves and tell what you’re thinking, and can then enact that for you?

Girl 1: No way, that’s creepy. So, like, if you wanted the president to die, it would happen?

Guy 1: Uh, no…there’s nothing receiving the signal in the president or something.

Girl 1: What about a pacemaker?

Guy 1: Well, that would mean that a doctor was aware that the pacemaker he was using was hooked up to such a device.

Girl 1: It could happen!

 

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