Wednesday, February 13, 2008
It’s the time of the year, when on Friday nights, Catholics smell like fish. It’s Lent. I always wondered where Lent came from, how it naturally occurs in one’s belly button. But these questions are for scholars, and I don’t know any, so they’ll be left to the wind.
Lent started on Ash Wednesday, last week, and goes till Easter—it’s 40 days during which Christians are supposed to better themselves. Usually one gives up something enjoyable and donates the money saved to charities. So I could, say, give up eating pretzels for a month and then donate the cash I save from not eating pretzels to charity.
But this year I’m thinking about doing something different, much different.
This Lenten season I have a suggestion for the masses. Why not, instead of giving up something that you enjoy for lent, pick up a few bad habits or just make some bad decisions, so that by the end of the 40 days you realize how good your life was and you never want to do those bad things again.
Take up smoking. Now I don’t mean this as in a cigarette a day. Go full-force into it; start smoking half a pack a day (I just heard cigarette companies CEOs start salivating).
Don’t go anywhere without at least three alcoholic beverages in your body. This means anywhere: work, class, church, the doctor; I don’t mean a weak drink either, something stiff. Go for a highball.
Marry a really ugly man/woman and move into a studio apartment in a bad part of town. This will make the time go much slower, but you just have to remember it’ll only last for less than a month.
Start driving a beat-up old pick up truck and drive in one-and-a -half lanes of any road.
Curse; start cursing a lot. If you’re not passing for a sailor or an auto mechanic, you’re failing.
Buy some Blink-182 CD’s. (Given, I already own most of these. I was in middle school once).
After 40 days of this — well in reality less than 40 cause it’s already been a week — when you revert back to your old life, if you can, you’ll realize how good you had it. Being able to breathe after walking up the hill, navigating an automobile without fear of it breaking down or of you running it into a streetlight, waking up in the morning to a pleasant face in a nice part of town, being able to talk in front of kids and having music in your collection that you’re proud of—the good life.
Or you know, you could just give up chocolate. Whatever.
Stewart is a Wichita junior in journalism.
Living through lent
The personal sacrifices made by KU students
Blackmon: Lent is more than excuse to ...
Lent is about connecting with religion, not declare sacrifice.
Better Options for Bad Situations: E-cigarettes
If you’re going to do it, be smart.
Regan: Smoking taboo doesn't fly abroad
Smoking in Ireland more acceptable than in U.S.
Lighting up en masse
The lethal addiction behind social smoking
College smoking creates concern for future
Students have resources on campus to quit smoking despite societal and emotional ...
Nichols: Accepting the f-bomb
Bad words are only as bad as we make them out to ...
Stewart: Internet inspires electronic ADD
A plethora of online distractions keep students from working
Free For All: Sept. 10, 2007
Did anybody see the K-State video on YouTube? Don’t forget your power ...
Students celebrate Easter with family and tradition
The holiday also marks the end of fasting for those who participate ...
Stewart: Finance health care with larger sin ...
To hell and back
A fight outside Naismith Hall began Thor Nystrom's year-long journey into the ...
Better Options for Bad Situations: Cursing
How to clean up your dirty mouth (at least when you have ...
Phillippe: Cigarette butts litter streets
No butts about it, leaving a trail of cigarette trash is inconsiderate ...
E-cigs provide no-smoke option
Electronic cigarettes use a liquid nicotine and offer a variety of flavors.
McNaughton: Smokers refuse to acknowledge health problems
I still don’t understand because smokers smell and taste terrible.
Hartz: Rules of the road when you’re ...
Cashiers notice your dirty habits; take note and our advice.
Stephens: Smoking causes relationship haze
Need some advice? Email Liz at lstephens@kansan.com to help solve anything from ...
Q&A: Remy Ayesh
Because we have questions. Celebrities have answers.
Bledowski: Too much of a good thing
Recent high-profile incidents have brought addiction to sex to light.
Good For You, Bad For You: Popping ...
Sometimes it's hard to tell.
Dykman: Vonnegut’s death has left void
The death of the famous author still hurts today but it is ...
Moffitt: Pressure on smokers to quit, harder ...
It is hard to give up smoking, but in a world where ...
Dent: Cursing ban to lower game intensity
The NCAA’s emphasis on bench decorum might make mothers happy. But colorful ...
Dodd: Kansas-Baylor from the couch
Kansan columnist’s thoughts during Monday’s game.
Stewart brings highlights
A thundering one-handed dunk and speedy recovery that turned into an impressive ...
Seeing Through the Smoke
For years, we've seen the Surgeon General's warning on cigarette packs. But ...
How to Train for Your First 5K
Becoming a runner isn't as impossible as you think...
Who???
Kansas in heat: The pitfalls of pornography
Relationship researcher Mike Anderson tackles the sticky world of relationship advice, one ...
No holds barred: The secret life of ...
It might be one of the most recession-proof jobs in America.
Stewart: Don't judge this
It's easy to categorize people based on cliques—jocks, brains, musicians—but in doing ...
Nichols: Parties require bigger, elaborate themes
Making up for bad high school party themes.
Cigarettes a drag on students’ wallets
KanUquit helps students grapple with financial, health concerns associated with smoking.
Holmes: Getting through the season of groundhogs ...
Take life lessons from the bleak, cold months of February.
KU alumnus in Japan describes quake experience
Jason Gibson, a KU alumnus and currently teaching English in Japan, talks ...
I'm gonna party like it's 1999!
Hookah trend grows
Smoking hookah may appear different from smoking cigarettes, but the effects can ...
Addicted to love
Falling in love resembles the physical effects of cocaine.
From left: Kimberlee Hinkle, Libby Johnson and Hannah ...
1 comment
Kansas Jayhawk fans hold aloft a reproduction of ...
2 comments
Erin Saupe, a Ph.D. student from St. Cloud, ...
1 comment
0 comments
Armed robbers continue to threaten.
3 comments
Lecture from Greg Mortenson, co-author of New York ...
0 comments
Comments
Stewart: Why not adopt bad habits for Lent?
or more realistically, it jovially poses questions about ones seriousness on lent: I know many catholics who don't take lent seriously, one of whom gave up miller to drink coors (or something); I would discuss with him life and religion before you take his humor for either of your foundationless options; if you are to take this one article as proof for his true character, then add my personal experience: he is one of the most intelligent, aware peoples i have met yet, in my creative writing college career, in life more realistically; can a fellow not have fun with himself? with his spirituality? in other words, do not criticize lack of understanding when you yourself do not understand the obvious premise; else I'll throw your name in the horrible pretentious hat that is lawrence; or should I use words bent lower towards a caustic character such as yourself: i fortuitously fund fat face for fisticuffs forthwith. humorless cuckold. ( yea, i just owned you )
Stewart: Why not adopt bad habits for Lent?
ross is going to have to marry me after i defended his honor so heartily
Sign in to comment
Or login with:
OpenID