Morning Brew: Introducing List Mania

By Mark Dent

Monday, November 10, 2008

Last week, my friend and boss, Matt Erickson, mentioned how Kansas City Star columnist Joe Posnanski used to make list columns every couple weeks in his first year on the job. I had no idea. So I looked some up in the archives. I liked them.

And it got me to thinking. I should do one. And second, you readers are probably smarter and cleverer than I am. So, send a list to morningbrew@kansan.com if you have a cool idea. If it’s the best one of the week, The Morning Brew will publish it.

Now, in honor of Posnanski, here is the first-ever Morning Brew List Mania.

Three goals for KU football against Texas

1. Not give up 52 points in the first half

2. Have Mark Mangino talk about three letters after the game, the B … C … S

3. Win. Hey, it could happen.

Four coaches K-State could realistically hire who are better than Ron Prince

1. Exiled Dennis Franchione

2. Retired Bill Snyder

3. Dillon High’s Eric Taylor

4. Anyone with a clipboard

The five best Christmas songs (KUDL and Star 102 are playing Christmas music continuously)

1. “Christmas Shoes” NewSong

2. “Gloria” Michael W. Smith

3. “Same Auld Lang Syne” Dan Fogelberg

4. “Happy Holidays” Andy Williams

5. “God Rest Ye Merry Gentleman” Barenaked Ladies and Sarah McLachlan

Three names better than Oklahoma City Thunder

1. The Oklahoma “City”

2. Oklahoma City Barons

3. Oklahoma City Fighting Bill Pullmans

Three people actually watching the NBA right now

1. Ahmad Rashad

2. The woman who used to be on NBA Inside Stuff with Ahmad Rashad

3. Frankie Muniz

Three shows that are still better to watch than early-season NBA

1. “Murphy Brown” re-runs

2. “Two and a Half Men”

3. “CSI: Branson, Mo.”

Interlude: So get this. While searching for TV shows on Google, I stumbled across an old show called “The Secret Diary of Desmond Pfeiffer.” It was on UPN 10 years ago and was a comedy about a black British man who became Abe Lincoln’s butler. It made fun of slavery. It was definitely not better than early season NBA.

Four things George W. Bush will do until Barack Obama takes over

1. Nap

2. Golf

3. Let Dick Cheney do everything.

4. Count down the days until Garrison Keillor no longer calls him the Current Occupant.

Questions

1. If Bush naps, plays golf and just follows his advisers the next two months, will it be any different than the last eight years?

2. Wouldn’t it be nice if somehow Angel Goodrich’s knee healed?

3. Whatever happened to Free Coffee Mondays at McDonald’s?

4. How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work?

5. Can Tyrel Reed shoot like he did last week every game?

6. If T.I. could give you whatever you like, what would you like?

— — Edited by Arthur Hur

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