Thursday, September 11, 2008
There comes a time in each person’s life when old personal records are broken. She’s never run that far in one try. He’s never failed that many classes. These accomplishments help us determine the direction in which our lives are going. This is the only reason I suggest you see Deb Hagen’s, (director of the 2004 smash hit Pee Shy), new movie, College. You’ll have found a sound candidate for the worst movie experience of your life.
Let’s face it. Expectations weren’t high to begin with. Two Disney Channel stars, Drake Bell and Andrew Caldwell, team up with former American Idol contestant Kevin Covais in an effort to take that next step into fame with a low-brow comedy. They certainly stepped in something.
Here’s the story, if you could call it that: Three high school kids spend a weekend at the local college to “find themselves” through drunken debauchery. This leads to meeting the members of a fraternity, who end up making their lives a living hell. How do our plucky heroes get revenge? Why, by out-grossing their fratty rivals, of course.
It’s not just that this movie is disgusting. Or that the writers rely on the lowest possible standard for generating laughs. Or that there isn’t a creative bit of content in the whole movie. Its main flaw is that it’s just not funny. Even those tickled by a good fart joke will be disappointed.
So if you have an hour and 20 minutes to waste, see College so you can tell your friends, “I’ve never seen a move that bad in my life!”
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