Friday, January 23, 2009
Frank Fulton doesn’t go out after class on Friday nights. Instead, he stays home to wash and iron his clothes.
Fulton, Bakersfield, Calif., junior, doesn’t have much free time on his hands because he is not only a student, but also a husband and a father.
“This degree is not just for me, it’s for my family,” he said. “It’s something I have to do.”
Frank Fulton, Bakersfield, Cali. junior, attends class in Blake Hall. Fulton and his wife are adjusting to life with a newborn baby.
Married couples such as the Fultons have become the minority. Omri Gillath, assistant professor of psychology, specializes in intimate relationships and said that as a general trend, fewer people were getting married.
This could change because Gillath said the state of the economy could affect people’s decision to get married. During times of anxiety and uncertainty, he said, students look for a safe haven, which companionship can provide.
Gillath also said he had seen an increase in couples seeing marriage consultants prior to getting married.
“You want to get married for the right reasons,” he said. “Make sure you are both ready.”
Fulton said that after leaving the military, he wasn’t thinking about marriage and was focused on school. He said that when he met his wife, Latonya, he knew the moment was right. The Fultons married in 2007.
Fulton had to miss the first day of classes this semester because Latonya went into labor.
“I felt very overwhelmed,” Fulton said.
He remembers thinking critically about the future on the drive home from the hospital.
“I was scared,” he said. “I thought, ‘Wow, how am I going to balance this? I don’t know how I am going to manage this.’”
Fulton’s schedule keeps him busy from sun-up to sun-down.
His day begins the night before. Both he and his wife iron their clothes in preparation for the morning routine. He wakes up around 6:30 a.m. to commute from Topeka to Lawrence for class. Afterward, he works at the Veterans Affairs Hospital in Topeka in the vocational rehab department. Finally, he returns home to tend to household chores, cook and take care of his son.
Fulton said he didn’t get to sleep until midnight at the earliest.
Fulton said that his military experience helped prepare him for juggling his personal and educational endeavors, and that students didn’t realize how easy they had it when they were responsible only for themselves.
“My priority is to take care of home first,” Fulton said. “To make sure the bills are paid and there is food on the table.”
Fulton said he knew performing poorly in school would have negative consequences for his family’s future.
Fulton described his life as more mellow than the average college student’s.
“My life is a lot more stable,” he said. “I can see the bigger picture of where I want to be because I have a family and I have to focus. I don’t have to worry about wildness, crazy friends or distractions.”
Latonya said she and her husband were trying to adjust to the changes in their lives, including a newborn child.
“The only sacrifice that we’ve really had to make is sleep,” she said. “We are just going around with blinders on trying to figure things out. We are trying to get down a routine.”
— — Edited by Liz Schubauer
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Married students bucking trend
Marriage has been around for quite a few years now, it is not something that was invented by KU students last year. People don't always do things for devious reasons, life is a lot more straight forward than some would have us believe.
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