Monday, April 11, 2011
When I was younger, one of my favorite parts of sporting events was the obligatory food giveaways. There are few things more exciting for a young boy than the possibility of a dozen free donuts if the Royals rack up twelve hits or a free pizza from a pretty cheerleader who deems you worthy of such a gift.
It’s a time-honored tradition in sports to bribe fans for their affection and loyalty through giveaways, the best of which are food. Sporting Kansas City has taken this strategy to an entirely new level.
The recently re-branded soccer team added to a slew of brilliant public relations maneuvers this season by starting a promotion where fans can get a free sandwich from a local restaurant whenever the Chicago Fire loses.
That’s right, when Chicago loses, Kansas City fans get a free sandwich. Not only that, but for every goal the Fire gives up over the course of the season, Sporting KC is donating $500 to its charity sponsor, LIVESTRONG. It’s the first promotional campaign that I’ve ever seen that’s based solely on the misfortune of a rival team. And it’s beautiful.
Part of the joy of being a die-hard supporter of any sports team is expressing completely irrational hatred toward an archrival. Sure, every once in a while there’s a historical reason to hate another group of athletes, like the whole Kansas-Missouri “you burned our town down that one time 150 years ago, so we’re going to get our revenge by playing that sport we invented” thing. But usually it just comes down to “you play in that city and we play in this city so we hate everything that you love and that’s just the way it is.”
So why not cash in on that arbitrary rivalry with a delicious arbitrary prize? While it’s surprising that this sort of rivalry-based promotion hasn’t caught on before, it could very well be Sporting KC’s greatest contribution to sports. Imagine if Lawrence joined in this tradition. Instead of Kansas fans merely sitting at home and gloating about every Missouri or Kansas State loss, each loss could turn into a minor holiday downtown with free food and drink and even shopping deals. Why not?
Some might say this would be forcing already established rivalries too far. But those people clearly don’t value free stuff. Plus, imagine the psychological effects it could have on visiting teams. In addition to slogans like “Beware of the Phog” and “Rock Chalk Jayhawk,” we could add “Every time you lose it’s like a mini Black Friday up in here!” It’d certainly add insult to injury knowing that every time you added another “L” to your record, your rival’s hometown was getting a small boost to its economy at the same time.
So while the Border Showdown might be fun now – take note, Lawrence businessmen and women – how much more fun would it be with a city full of Border Markdowns?
— Edited by Marla Daniels
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