Q. How do you feel about long-distance relationships with guys who are kind of sketch? How would you expect them to show you they’re being faithful in a situation like that?

A. I am not a believer in long-distance relationships — not all, but most. Especially if you or your relationship is fairly young, I advise against trying. You even mention that the guy is “kind of sketch.” Why would you want to date someone like that? One of the reasons why long-distance relationships are tough is because it is tough to show someone you are being faithful.

Long-distance relationships are a breeding ground for paranoia, stress and inevitable heartache. Relationships need intimacy to survive, and it is tough to get and show intimacy through the phone.

To fully answer your second question, I’m not sure there is a way to show that. You simply have to trust your partner. A lot of that trust that I’m talking about comes from experience together and intimate self-disclosure. Both of which are difficult to do over a telephone or Skype.

If you think this guy is sketch and might struggle with a long-distance relationship, then stop trying.

-Mike Anderson

A. Trust and intimacy are vital components of successful long-term relationships. Dating someone long-distance builds unavoidable barriers and prevents the development of trust and intimacy.

I do not recommend long-distance dating. Unfortunately, it sounds to me like you are already in a long-distance relationship with this “sketch” guy, or you’re strongly considering it. Why are you choosing (or considering) to date someone you don’t trust? Why are you dismissing potential dating partners in your area? I assure you that on the nights you do not see him, you will be stressed with the worry that he is with another girl. Why waste your time?

Spend time nurturing yourself and relationships with your friends. The more time you spend out in the community, laughing and having fun, the greater your chances are of meeting someone with whom you have a connection and can devote the time necessary to develop trust and intimacy.

-Michelle Macbain