FFA 2019

 

FFA of the day: “I had sex for a whole hour and 2 minutes last night. Shout out to daylight savings.”

“I’m parked in the pussy pockets of campus”

"Sometimes I don't know how to respond to things except through memes."

"I can't hoe down. I only have one level and that is hoe UP."

"You don't need emotions for a hoe phase." 

"She told me my reproductive organs were unremarkable."

“I prefer talking to people who are depressed.”

“does anyone have drugs right now? i need to wake up”

“i’m SO high on sudafed right now.”

"imagine having a sugar daddy for lunchables"

“You need your water bottle you dehydrated slut”

Next Halloween I’m dressing up as a sexy “I voted” sticker

"I LOVE an election. Democracy is my brand."

Vending machines are stupid. They’re just fridges that hand you the soda 

"Is Big Time Rush a tampon brand?"

“Condoms prevent minivans”

“You know you’ve shown up too early when the Bull bathroom smells like a normal bathroom”

Sexy legs is allowed to hoe around

"I'm going to bully some serotonin in your brain."

"You looked like you were about to start speaking parseltongue"

"Shout out to all my hoes who had H1N1" 

“I get it, you’re 70, you can do whatever you want.”

"The amount of Britney Spears I listen to is directly proportional to how depressed I am" 

“Being a woman is hard because I like wearing cute outfits but I don’t like it when men look at me”

"this is like being at a rave where the lights are on"