Stewart: Top 9 reasons I won’t take male birth control
By Ross Stewart (Contact)
Monday, September 29th, 2008
There’s research being conducted on a male contraceptive pill here at the University. The pill would effectively brings a man’s sperm count to zero. Here’s why I’m weary of the idea:
9: I could always just buy a condom.
8: I don’t want my roommate to ask me how it feels to shoot blanks when my girlfriend sleeps over.
7: The girl could always buy the pill, which means I can continue not having a real job.
6: I don’t think I have enough sex to warrant bringing my sperm count to zero. And if I did, I’d probably be so worn out that I’d want less sex or require a condom to keep chaffing to a minimum. (Also, that much sex would be so physically wearing that I would be so mentally tired that I’d forget to take the pill anyway).
5: When my sperm count starts to regenerate, I won’t be able to stand to think about how lonely it could be down in my testicles. What will the first sperm think to itself? It’ll either find existence frightening or will look at its existence with excitement because there’s no competition.
4: If I ever want a political career and it gets out that I used to take the male contraceptive pill, I’ll look like a harlot. Then again John Edwards wouldn’t have had so much press about his affair if he had used this pill.
3: What if my sperm count doesn’t go back up? If I had wanted that to happen, I would’ve drank a lot more Surge in middle school.
2: I don’t want to embarrassingly drop my male birth control packet in front of my female friends and shyly have to pick it up.
1: I could not have sex. Wait, did I really just suggest that?
Stewart is a Wichita senior in journalism.
Discussion
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Wary, maybe? lrn2rite
But no, there is a more important reason that you can't take male birth control. That reason: Without giving birth, you can never know the joy of being a parent.
I was just expressing my personal opinion. I bet you're one of those hypocritical "liberals" that spit on the beliefs of others constantly. You people make me sick. Truly, there is no hate lik Liberal Hate.
I thought from the headline that there would be ONE good reason, and was very disappointed to find that 3 of the reasons were about what other people would think about him and the rest didn't have much thought or research behind them. Girls take birth control pills and it doesn't make them look like harlots or embarrassed about it. Grow up. And yes you can just buy a condom, but the need for the pill is people DON'T buy them.
"Here’s why I’m weary of the idea:" "...keep chaffing to a minimum" "...I would’ve drank a lot more Surge...." And this is from a journalism senior? Otherwise, not a bad satiric rant.
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