Students participate in abusive relationships
Numbers involved with violent significant others rising
According to recent surveys, roughly 30 percent of college students have been involved in physically violent relationships.
By Dylan Sands
Wednesday, October 10th, 2007
According to recent studies, more and more college students are being subjected to violence by their significant others. Researchers have said that students needed to be aware of the warning signs and take steps to ensure they do not become involved in such relationships.
Dating violence is the term used to describe any form of abuse, be it physical or verbal, which occurs in an intimate relationship. Sandra Stith, professor of family studies and human services at Kansas State University said that 30 percent of college students had been in relationships that involved physical violence. She said a much greater number of students had suffered emotional abuse.
“Psychological violence is the most prevalent,” Stith said. “It can lead to much more serious things like physical violence.”
Woochan Shim, assistant professor of social welfare at the University of Kansas, said a wide variety of behavior could constitute violence. She said controlling behavior was a major factor.
Sometimes research blinds us. Alcohol and past histories of violence may be risk factors, but they are not causes.
-Woochan Shim, assistant professor of social welfare
“Ordering someone to wear certain things or not hang out with certain people are some examples,” Shim said. “Any time someone’s freedom is limited, it can be abuse.
The Center for Disease Control and Prevention estimates that 1 in 3 college students will be involved in an abusive relationship. The CDC cites alcohol use and childhood traumas as factors that might spur a person to abuse his or her partner.
Shim said that there is no single cause for abuse.”
“Sometimes research blinds us,” she said. “Alcohol and past histories of violence may be risk factors, but they are not causes.”
Stith came up with a broad list of questions that could help one evaluate his or her relationship. One question asks: “Does your partner try to control your life?”
“You should avoid extreme neediness where the other person wants every second of your time,” Stith said.
Another question she says one should ask is: “Do I feel better or worse about myself when I am in this relationship?”
“Low self-esteem is a very serious concern,” she said. “If you feel like you’re constantly walking on eggshells around this person, it’s not right.”
A third question involves the link between substance abuse and violence: “Is your partner involved in heavy alcohol or drug use?”
Both Shim and Stith said that it is important to remember that both men and women can be victims of dating violence.
“Studies consistently find that it is equal,” Stith said. “Both men and women are psychologically controlling.”
Shim said that all too often, men were viewed as the enemy. She said she hoped to see programs in the future that incorporate male leaders in teaching children about how to have healthy relationships early on.
“We need to acknowledge the fact that men do get victimized,” she said. “For us to end violence in our society, we can’t target just one enemy, we need to work together. Prevention should start early.
— Edited by Luke Morris
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