White: Nickelodeon memories are nicko-lame
It’s not as great as you remember; deal with it
By Zach White
Thursday, September 20th, 2007
The following is a conversation that is statistically happening in at least two separate locations on campus at this very moment.
Youth One: “Hey, you guys remember old school Nickelodeon? Man, it used to be so awesome back in the day. It used to have all the best cartoons, and game shows and real shows. You remember Stick Stickly, that Popsicle stick with the face and the googley eyes? That was so cool. Stick Stickly ruled.”
Youth Two: “Did you guys ever watch “Rocko’s Modern Life?” That was such a great cartoon. He was a wallaby and stuff, and his dog was Spunky. You remember Heifer, his best friend, the fat cow whose family was all wolves? You remember his friend Philbert the turtle, who said, “I’m nauseous” and “fishsticks” all the time? Man that show was so awesome. That show was the best show ever.”
Youth Three: “Do you guys remember “Salute Your Shorts,” that show about the summer camp? It had Donkey Lips, and that guy from “Terminator 2” and Ug the counselor. You know, I heard that guy from Rilo Kiley was on it. And the theme song, that was so sweet. “Makes me want to fart” and all that. That show was so awesome. That show was the best show ever.”
Youth One: “They had so many awesome game shows too. They had “Double Dare” and “What Would You Do?” with all the obstacles and slime and things. I totally wished I could have gotten slimed back then. It had Marc Summers. He was so awesome. Have you guys seen that new show he has on the Food Network recently about candy or something? He is so awesome. That is the best show ever.”
Youth Three: “There were the other games shows like “Wild and Crazy Kids” with Omar Gooding, Cuba Jr.’s brother, “Guts” with the Aggro Crag and “Legends of the Hidden Temple” with those guards, Olmec and some guy hosting. Those were so awesome. Those were the best game shows ever.”
Youth Two: “Do you guys remember “Nick News” with Linda Ellerbee? That show was kind of lame.”
Youth One: “Oh man, remember Snick? That was totally awesome. The orange couch up the hill, and the old purple and black logo. Remember when they had the old “All That,” back when it was actually good and with funny people on it? Old Kenan and Kel, and their Good Burger stuff. That was so great. And “Are You Afraid Of The Dark?” was great. There was that campfire that they all sat around and then whoever had the story would throw the dirt into the fire and it would get all weird. That show was terrifying. I remember one about aliens or something. Snick was so awesome. That was the best block of programming ever.”
Youth Three: “Man, what happened to Nickelodeon? It used to be so good back in the day. But if you watch it now, it’s like it sucks now. What the hell?”
White is a Colorado Springs, Colo., junior in journalism.
Discussion
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"Nicko-lame?" Seriously?
Awful.
Why did you print this? Was the town blurry when you wrote it? Do most Kansan columnists drink and write angry columns every day?
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