Swinging an option for stressed students
Web sites, casual sex spur interest in swinging lifestyle
Some consider it immoral for couples to exchange sexual partners, or to “swing.” Yet, even some KU students practice swinging in hopes of eliminating possible stress from a committed relationship.
Friday, September 21st, 2007
What do tests, money, peer-pressure, and the future have in common? If you guessed stress, then you are correct. It’s no shock that many college students choose to be single when the idea of a committed relationship can cause chaos and waste amounts of time and energy. It seems as if there is no balance for young adults who want to enjoy the benefits of a significant other, yet live in the fast lane like college students who have no strings attached. “Swinging” (not swing dancing) is not the first solution that comes to mind but there are people both young and old who prefer this type of casual commitment.
Mat Wygal, Hill City junior, openly describes his own swinging lifestyle and the benefits thereof.
Photo by Anna Faltermeier
PHOTO ILLUSTRATION
“My girlfriend and I are priority to each other, but if we want to have a good time… we can. I don’t plan on [swinging] forever. Neither of us are truly ready to settle down at this point in our lives.”
When asked whether jealousy ever played a part in the relationship, Wygal had only one thing to say:
“We discuss everything and my girlfriend knows that she comes first. Swinging is based on sex not emotions.”
As unusual as swinging may seem, the practice in which a person or couple engages in the act of exchanging sexual partners, is more common than society would like to imagine. Adultfriendfinder, Swinglifestyle and Swingular are just a few of the Web sites where the interested can join communities that share the same feelings toward swinging. According to Holistic Wisdom, Inc., a Web site dedicated to sex education, swinging began in the 1950’s and transformed from the term “wife-swapping.” Libchrist.com also describes the manner in which swinging was started. U.S. Air Force pilots moved their wives closer to base and because of fatality rates inter-relations occurred and soon became the norm. The practice has often been a manner in which couples can keep the fire alive in the bedroom, and possibly even bring the individuals in a couple closer.
Ericka Brune, a nursing student at Johnson County Community College, is Wygal’s girlfriend.
“Swinging is something that I discovered due to friends of mine. They were open with each other and seemed happy. I had been in a few controlling relationships and they were a motivating factor for me. In past relationships I had wanted to cheat, but swinging allows me to do what I want and be completely honest with my partner. We don’t feel limited.”
Brune mentions the negatives of a swinging relationship as well.
“[Swinging] is not as easy as I thought it would be. I didn’t know what I was getting into. Of course, everybody gets jealous but it’s all about communication. Whether dating one person or three, it’s good to be honest and communicate with each other. Right now I’m in no hurry to settle down but when I do, I think that a monogamous relationship will be beneficial for the children and the whole family.”
Students such as Kamaria Cartledge, Wichita sophomore, have different outlooks toward the swinging lifestyle.
“Swinging is immoral and sex should be sacred between couples. It basically signals that the relationship is neither strong nor valid.”
Benefits of swinging may include freedom from a straining relationship. Swingers are more apt to express their deepest desires with a partner who is just as open as them. Communication tends to be better than in other relationships, and everyone seems to win. The downside of swinging can be jealousy and a lack of willingness to pursue the practice. Couples must have a certain level of trust to even consider swinging. There is no guarantee that one partner won’t have a change of heart somewhere down the road and want to put an end to the practice.
— Edited by Chris Beattie
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