Girl 1: How much do you think each boob weighs?
Girl 2: I don’t know. Maybe 15 pounds each?
Girl 1: That much?
Girl 2: I don’t know. Maybe not.
Chemistry professor: You guys wouldn’t believe what chemists do to each other in the lab late at night.
Guy 1: I’ve never taken a shot of straight gin. I don’t even know what happens.
Guy 2: When I drink it, nothing’s left. All the bottle is gone.
Guy 1: I hear when you drink it, your clothes come off.
Girl: To have a MySpace, don’t you have to be a musician or something?
Guy: No, you just have to be a slut who wants to get some.
Girl: So, like, a slutty musician?
Girl 1: What are you doing tonight? Going out?
Girl 2: Eh, I don’t know. I might.
Girl 1: You need to! Come get crazy with us for Lent!
Girl: I’ll call you if I need a drunk driver. Wait…I’ll be drunk. You be sober.

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