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Cheap Chillin': Burger Stand Up and more!

CHALK Cheap Chillin'

Cheap Chillin’ is a bi-weekly column spotlighting cheap thrills for University students around Lawrence.

After a weekend of spring football game tailgates and mom days, your wallet needs a break. Cheap Chillin’ is here to give you something exciting to do in Lawrence this week while on a tight budget.

Burger Stand Up Comedy Night

Burger Stand at the Casbah will be hosting a standup comedy night, Thursday April 18, at 8 p.m.

“There is a real shortage of places for local stand up comics to call home here in Lawrence,” Bates Co. Director of Operations Beau Bruns says.

Burger Stand promises a night of great food, drinks, and local comedy talent. This event will be hosted downstairs in the Beer Hall, and is sponsored by Destihl Brewery.

“One of our bartenders and local DJ, Joey Pauda, has taken this passion project and brought it to our guests and it has been very well received,” Bruns says.

Visit the Burger Stand’s Facebook page for a full list of all comics performing.

Cheap Chillin Burger Stand.jpg

The Burger Stand offers $5 burgers and fries every night after 10 p.m.

Kansas Relays and Big 12 Tennis Championships

The KU Track and Field team and the Women’s Tennis team are ready to put on a show at Rock Chalk Park this weekend for KU Relays and the Big 12 Tennis Championship.

Starting Wednesday, April 17, and continuing through Saturday, the 92nd Kansas Relays are hosted at Rock Chalk Park in West Lawrence. Beginning Thursday and finishing on Sunday, the Big 12 Tennis Championship will be held at the Jayhawk Tennis Center at Rock Chalk Park.

On Friday and Saturday, there will be food trucks and happy hours from 12 p.m. to 8 p.m. Friday, and 12 p.m. to 4 p.m. on Saturday. There will also be fun zones for kids, and yes, that also means the kid inside all of us.

After junior Bryce Hoppel won the 800-meter leading him to an undefeated solo season, and both the men’s and women’s teams placing top four at the Big 12 Championships, KU Relays is set to be a very competitive meet for the Jayhawks.

While Wednesday and Thursday are free, tickets start at $5 for youth and $10 for adults for a one-day ticket to KU Relays. Single day tickets to the Big 12 Tennis Championships are $5, and all session tickets are $15. Visit the Kansas Athletics website for a full list of events and times.

Kansas Classic - 2

Sophomore Darius Releford takes off in the men's 60-meter hurdles at the Jayhawk Classic on Saturday, Jan. 26.

Earth Day Tree and Wildflower Planting

Although Earth Day isn’t until Monday, the Lawrence community is already making efforts to clean the city up this weekend.

One group, The Friends of the Kaw, is hosting a tree and wildflower planting at the Kansas River.

“Earth Day is important to Friends of the Kaw because it is a day to celebrate the natural resources of our world and for us, to showcase the beauty of the Kansas River,” Kansas Riverkeeper Dawn Buehler says. “Friends of the Kaw is a non-profit, dedicated to protecting and preserving the 173-mile long Kansas River.”

Volunteers will meet at the Lawrence River Trails in North Lawrence Saturday, April 20 at 8 a.m.


Person 1: This song slaps.

Person 2: Your mom slaps.

Person 1: Thank you, my mom is a kind and wonderful lady.

 Person 1: I’m so sick of alcohol.

Person 2: I don’t know, I’m getting stronger every day. I love it.

Person 1: Do you do the vegan wrap here?

Person 2: We can do the chicken wrap with no cheese?

Person 1: I’ll take the Beyond Burger please. 

Person 1: Oh my God! I feel like I know you somehow…

Person 2: Yeah, we went to high school together. 

Person 1: Oh! *walks off*

Guy 1: Is the black market even real? Has anyone ever been on it?

Guy 2: I tried once but I couldn’t figure out how to get on.

Guy 1: I stayed up until 2 am watching Disney plus

Guy 2: I told my girlfriend I fell asleep but I was actually watching the Mandalorian.

Girl 1: How long have you guys been dating?

Girl 2: Since the summer, well actually for like two years but it’s a long story.

Girl 1: Who are you looking for?

Girl 2: This guy, wait I found him. Fanny pack boy. He flipped off my professor after a test and ran out of the classroom.

Girl 1: How did you choose KU? 

Girl 2: Honestly, I flipped a coin. 

Boy 1: Did I tell you? I think I had a threesome this weekend.

Boy 2: Woah, hold up. You think?

Boy 1: I was born a Phi Delt.

Boy 2: Please don’t ever say that again.

Girl 1: How do you get your boobs to look like that?

Girl 2: I don’t ever wear a bra? I don’t know. 

Girl 1: I just really want a guy to bend me over you know?

Girl 2: How do you know? You’re a virgin!

Guy: Sometimes I wish I could just be a dog and sleep all day. 

Girl: You wake up at like three every day. 

Guy: I know.

Girl: So…

Guy: So does that make me a dog or something?

Girl 1: I wish I was a little bit taller.

Girl 2: I wish I was balder.

Girl 1: I wish I had a...wait, wait, wait balder?

Guy 1: Let’s slap dicks

Guy 2: You ever pee and it feels like throwing up?

Woman 1: *holding baby* He would have been safer at the Hawk

Woman 2: Oh absolutely.

Girl 1: I would never date that guy.

Girl 2: Well, it depends how much money he has.

Girl 1: I’m going to the doctor to see if I have bronchitis before I hook up with him again.

Girl 2: Yeah that’s smart so you don’t give it to anyone else. 

Girl 1: No I mean I want to make sure I infect him.

Guy 1: I'm cutting some of my unnecessary costs, starting with Juuling.

Guy 2: Ight man, good luck.

Guy 1: Actually I might just start chewing

Guy 1: How was work?

Guy 2: My manager was chastising me for not dressing up in a Halloween costume, she doesn’t understand I’m strictly here to get paid.

Guy 1: I am so tired of this week, man

Guy 2: Dude it’s Monday

Guy 1: I know

Person#1: I want to be on the first ship to mars

Person#2: Not me, I doubt they have Wi-Fi

Perons#1: Yeah but at least they’re evolving up there. We’re all just devolving.

Girl 1: Um, I don’t eat pig.

Girl 2: You eat bacon all the time, bitch.

Guy 1: You better get going. 

Guy 2: Yeah, see ya. I’m off to get some Adderall.

Girl 1: Are you home right now?

Girl 2: Yeah, why?

Girl 1: I bought a cat

Girl 1: I just don't understand what fishing is for.

Girl 2: I don't know. Food, maybe?

Guy: I’m just gonna have to like carry an entire box of spiders up the hill tomorrow.

Girl: What?

Guy: Yeah, just like a hundred spiders in a box.

Guy 1: Sometimes ya just gotta give yourself a haircut.

Guy 2: Dude, you shaved half your head. That’s not a haircut, that’s a mess.

Girl 1: Can you eat fruit raw?

Girl 2: How else are you supposed to eat it?

Girl: That class is killing us. ​But they say rest is for the dead.

Guy: Well, at least we'll be rested.

Girl: She's not in class this semester

Guy: Maybe she's dead

Girl: Or studying abroad